So, a lot of people know I, at 25 years old, have yet to go on a date.
But, my cousin and some friends have been encouraging me to make this the year it happens. By this year, they mean 2014. As for my 25th year, in 2 months (actually, a month and a half), it’ll be too late for that.
Along the way, we’ve talked wardrobe, we’ve talked confidence, we’ve practiced conversation. And, I document the process.
But, here’s the thing about dating. If there are no people to date, dating doesn’t happen. If my “numbers aren’t up”, so to speak, there will be no one for me to date. And, numbers is kind of a problem in my life.
I go to a small school, a tiny church, and, until a few months ago, worked as a Nanny, where my only interaction was with the family. Not many options in any of these places…And, by not many, I mean: 0. That’s right, none.
So, with my confidence up, my wardrobe styled, and my drive dwindling, I took to the internet.
Online dating is such a weird thing.
You read a profile, look at the pictures, attempt to decide if you’d be compatible with this person, and then decide whether or not to message them.
At the beginning, if you decide yes, the waiting for the them to message back can be agonizing. Suddenly, (at the beginning of the process) a message back from this person who is literally nothing in your life becomes very important to you. Though, after a few weeks of not hearing back from anyone (that’s right, no responses…), that waiting just becomes the norm.
And if a response comes? Great.
So, that’s where I am. Here I am, waiting on responses, while constantly feeling the pressure of responding. Wading through messages from guys who are clearly only in it for the hook-up (thank you OKCupid…) & the guys who clearly have nothing in common with me (no, sorry, I cannot spend 5 hours a day playing video games with you, I’m not that intense of a gamer-girl…) Oooh, or my favorite “hey, wanna come over to my place so I can cook for you & we can cuddle and watch a movie? Or I could go to your house and cook?” Um…No, you can’t come cook at my house & no, I will not be visiting your creepy, murder house… (Ok, so, it’s possible he was a nice guy who doesn’t actually live in a murder house, but, call me picky, I don’t do presumptuous.)
For a brief time, I was talking to a guy who responded to one of my messages. We seemed to share a bit in common and he even at one point described me as “totally cute”, which made me smile. But the distance just wasn’t working 😦 I’ll admit, that one was kind of a bummer, but I press on.
So, enter the Airman. We have exchanged several messages, initiated by him (point in his favor 🙂 ). So, we’ll just have to see where we go from here.
But, I keep coming back to: this process of online dating is weird at times. It strikes me (only sometimes) as something akin to shopping for books on amazon: Sometimes, the covers are really important; sometimes the covers are deceiving; sometimes normal looking covers are hiding crazy & crazy looking covers are hiding normal…(My friend Belle, as in Of The Library, has some great stories about online dating, and she is much funnier than I. Check her blog out.)
The point is, without people, there is no dating, so I have to go where the people are, and apparently, they are online…
Let the adventure continue 🙂
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