“I’m gonna die alone, guys!”
I lamented this sentence to a table of teens today at church…who really had no response.
What do you say to someone when they say this? I mean, honestly, you can’t promise them it’s not true…but, to agree is rude.
So, awkward silence is the only option.
The truth is, though, I know what I am waiting for. And I know this life is crazy beautiful as it is.
When we’re in high school, theres this amazing paradox going on in our heads: everything will last forever, even though it’s all about to change.
The beauty of years is learning – if we are in something for the long run, we will take it slow. In this generation of wanting instant results, we can still learn to wait.
If I want a relationship to last, and the other person wants time & space, I know I can give it to them without threat. If it lasts – all the better. If it fades, there is something to learn from it: to make me wiser, stronger.
This is the same lesson learned in my career. I know where I am now is not where I will always be, but I have so much growth and experiencing to do here…
So, I don’t lower my standards or expectations. I still pray for the integrity & heart of my future “him”.
I continue to hold myself to a high standard, living a life I love, devoted to my Abba, balancing work & play.
And I continue to work & pray that God will open up a career that both honors Him & helps others, but that also brings me joy.
Because what will be, will be.
And, it will be determined by my patience and perseverance today (or not).
So, I am willing to keep it all up, grateful for the life God is blessing me with, hardships and all. Knowing I don’t have it all together, and am fully reliant on Him.
Knowing that if I am in it for the long run, I will be patient and practice perseverance. Trusting Him when my bills are tight, when my job isn’t what I expected, when I am alone (& especially when feeling lonely).
Praying for myself to become the right person, for the right person. And, praying for “his” patience & perseverance, along the way, too.
It’s the greatest way I know to make what will be, better than I could ever imagine for myself.
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