The sky was dark, as with every morning.
Panic. I’m going to be late!
My eyes shoot open. Thinking it’s Monday, I’m ready to shoot out of bed at 6:15.
Then I remember, it’s Sunday. And, I have two more glorious hours of sleep.
Snag in the plan, though, I slept through my alarm.
Apparently, the sleep is needed this weekend.
You see, at the end of a long week, I’ve grown weary. And, I suppose, recently, weary in general.
But, I managed to roll out of bed and get to Sunday School, and what a day to go. A day when we were discussing Hosea – a beautiful reflection of how God really works – a God that is in the business of pursuing.
You see, I want to say I identify with Hosea, but more often than not, I fear I am more of an Israel (or Gomer, as it were).
Easily tempted by the trappings of this world.
Often finding myself in my own selfish pursuits.
Overruled by desire.
And, I’ve grown weary.
I’ve grown weary of seeing brokenness around day in and out.
I’ve grown weary of not turning to my Abba as I should.
I’ve grown weary of not being where I thought I’d be, even if I’m where God has placed me.
I’ve grown weary of being surrounded by the temptations & trappings of the world.
I’ve grown weary of finding myself in my own selfish pursuits.
I’ve grown weary of being overruled by the desires of the lights of the world.
I’ve grown weary of holding on to my own brokenness and sin, instead of turning from them to the arms of God,
But, I have hope.
I have hope that God is in pursuit, always.
I have hope, that like he did with the people of Israel, He still pursues His people.
Hope that He knows where our choices today will lead tomorrow, and He still steps in to try to get us where He wants us.
As He told the people of Israel through Hosea:
“I will betroth you to me forever;
I will betroth you in righteousness and justice,
in love and compassion.
I will betroth you in faithfulness,
and you will acknowledge the Lord.”
– Hosea 2:19-20
Even with all of their turning to their own prosperity, their own desires, their own sins, God still opened Himself up for them.
He did this for Humanity with His son. Christ is that redemption.
And, in Christ, I find my hope:
I have hope that though I’m not where I thought I’d be, I am where God has led me.
I have hope that, despite the brokenness around, Humanity, as a whole, will still come through for one another.
I have hope that, even though I have my own brokenness, I can turn it over to my Abba; and that I learn to do so more and more each day.
I have hope that God will provide a way out when tempted by the trappings of this world – I need only be open.
I have hope that my salvation is secure in Christ – and I cling to that hope each day.
And so, even though I have grown weary, I will rest in Him. And, I will continue to work each day to be more like Hosea and less like Gomer.
This week, I am joining in with Kate over at Heading Home for 5 Minute Friday. This week’s prompt is Weary.
One thought on “I’ve Grown Weary”
I loved your whole post. I can identify with so much of it. “I have hope that God is in pursuit, always.” We always have this hope. He will never leave or forsake us and we can rest in that knowledge. Blessings to you! I’m your neighbor at Five Minute Friday.
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